Tongue-Tied Lecturer

I have been a lecturer for more than two years. Being a lecturer at the age of 22 has its own difficulties. The image of a lecturer in our minds is that of a middle age guy with greying hair, in a tweed suit, wearing glasses and having eyes full of wisdom. A young guy with a french beard, long hair, t-shirts, torn jeans and earphones plugged in? Yeah, not so much.

My first batch was a horrible experience. I didnt know how to act like a proper lecturer. So instead of being a lecturer, I tried to be the friend of students. They didnt take me seriously because of me being young an all, so I used to be waiting for them in class while they were in the bowling centre! Baaaaad experience. When my second batch started, I took a leaf out of Dr. Miranda Bailey's book from Grey's anatomy. The first class, as an introduction of myself, I told the students how I am in a position to make their lives hell if they cross me. And I have been doing this since then because it is very effective plus fun for me. I do become friendly overtime. But the initial lecture? It stays with them.

I have had a pretty diverse group of students with respect to nationalities as well as age. Some are just 17 years old whereas there are some who are in their late 30s with 2,3 kids!! But to them, inside the classroom, I am their lecturer. I have always had this thing where I get sort of nervous and uncomfortable infront of a real good looking guy. Mostly I either dont talk to them or if I have to, I avoid eye contact. I wondered what would I do if I ever got a hunk as a student. But thankfully that never hapenned. Most of my male students were average looking. No one ever grabbed my attention except one who was a little above average but still just a kid. I've had pretty good looking female students. But sadly, not interestd ;)

Yesterday I was teaching as usual when the door opened and in came a guy from my nightmares! Very short hair, french beard, curious eyes, height almost as same as mine and a hot body!! I saw him and was filled with dread. I asked him if he was looking for my class or came accidentally. I kept praying "please say by mistake, please!!!" But he said he was looking for my class. So I asked him to sit down. Then I turned towards the board to compose myself. Also, I had totally forgotten what I was teaching!!!

For the first few minutes I totally avoided looking at him because he was staring at me! Other students look at me, he STARES!!!! As a result, I got almost tongue tied once or twice when I did look at him.I was worried that if I looked into his eyes, he would figure out I am gay! Silly me. But then I tried to calm myself and get over this phobia. He was after all my student. I made him very small in my head, put him in a tiny box and looked at him. Man, he can stare! Lol. But then I asked him a few questions, helped him in solving a few, so I was able to get through the day without embarassing myself. I did however cover my crotch area with my notes every time I turned towards the students!

Anyways, the dean has asked me to give a few extra classes to the new comers, including him. Here's hoping I dont make a fool of myself :) But is it soooooo bad to just hope that he finds me alone in the class sitting on the desk, closes the door, comes within inches of my face, grabs me firmly and.........crap! I am a BAD lecturer!!!